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eating a bullet is getting more and more attractive every day.

i don't mind saying this because nobody knows me here:

i lost my virginity at age 12. not with a boy, but with my step-father. i was already hot for him and i knew he wanted me. i had spied on him when he was in the shower and i saw his large, hairy penis. he caught me and told me to never do it again. i just smiled and we both knew what would happen next. the first time he fucked me it did hurt, but only a bit. after he popped my cherry it felt wonderful to be filled up with his throbbing manhood. we did everything: oral, 69, dildo, anal, every sex position you can imagine - we did it all. i loved fucking him. best sex of my life was that year we fucked. i miss him so much. i miss having him deep inside me. i miss his hot breath in my ear. i miss hearing him moan and groan, and i miss feeling him cum inside me.

bitching and complaining is a sport to me. i dont mean 96% of the shit i say. i spit a big game but its all so you think im a man and im tough. im not. if you even threatened me on the street, i would easily hand you the key to my car and run away like a little bitch. sorry not sorry.

back on holiday from college we all got together. one of my friends had a boyfriend at her school and they both stopped drinking but we pointed out he aint here so drink! she got wasted. i made out with her because we used to date in high school. later we had sex and it was weird because my friend watched us. i went for more beer and when i came back she was making out with him on the couch so i went upstairs to play video games. later i could hear them doing it. the next day she is all mad and said we got her drunk and this was my fault. i feel bad but a lot of the night was her own decision. i was like have a beer not have 5 tequila slammers with long island ice teas. plus she did have sex with my friend.

sometimes i get so horny i dont know how to get off. i try but can never an orgasm (i'm a girl) and too young to have sex but sometimes i just want someone to fuck me rele hard.

happy nig*** fried chicken day. go to the welfare offfice, get your free check, go buy drugs and ripple, beat and rape a woman, abandon your offspring, rob a store, use the f word constantly and then eat some fried chicken to celebrate.

I watched porn again tonight, the female worship kind.
was so sexually frustrated beforehand, that I bit my arm twice last night while talking to someone online who didn't know it. I didn't tell him about just how wet I really was tonight. I can't allow myself to go there.

i left my ex-boyfriend who i was supposed to marry to be with the boyfriend i have now. we've been together 8 months already, and i love him more then i ever imagined possible. he is so good to me.

but, for some reason i can't let go of my ex. i know it's wrong and selfish but i feel like i don't want him but i don't want anyone else to have him either. that in some way he belongs to me, and i don't care if it's torture for him; i don't ever want him to stop loving me. and if i have to spend one weekend a month with him to make sure that doesn't happen, so be it.

i'm not this sort of person. i was always strongly against cheating, so i don't really understand why i feel such an overwhelming need for him to be mine. i would never even consider being with him again, he treated me like shit. i don't want to be with him, but i refuse to be without him.

i actually have nightmares where i call him to go see him and he tells me he's busy. i don't have them often but the once in awhile when i do, i toss and turn and have problems sleeping. what is my issue??

holy crap i drank 2 bottles of wine tonight. i had a party at my house, and one thing led to another, and we were partying our asses off. i had a good time, but holy crap.

I have pretty much come to accept that I really am bisexual. For along time I thought such a thing was bull shi*, but here I am.

I am female and the female in the relationship with my husband. He is nice and kind, a bit overprotective and sometimes a bit demanding, but a woman's work is never done, and it takes two to make a home, raise children and all that stuff. I am the woman to him being the man.

I have also, with my husband's knowledge and permission, an intimate, caring, loving and at times very sexual relationship with another woman. My husband introduced her to me, she works for him, and she and I hit a spark so bright. Butterflies and weak knees and endless kisses. That is who she is to me. As I am my husband's wife, she is 'my' wife. Except she can't bear my children, she bears his.

I am convinced that in another place, another day, if i wasn't my husband's wife, we would have been content to be together, just the two of us, but where would our children have come from? Whose name would we carry? whose home would we keep? Sharing my life with her has made me a better wife, being married with him has given me the strength to have a woman in my life.

I am not young and crazy, I am 53, married for 30 years, and in a loving partner relationship for 22 of my 30 years of marriage.

my husband has his girl friend, she was his girlfriend before we met. they have a daughter. we've been married five years, but he still keeps his girlfriend. i asked him to decide, i am not asking him to stop seeing her, he won't ever leave her, it is just that he should decide to only have one woman. i want children, and it would look bad if they were still together, so i only asked him to stop having sexual relations with her. i might as well have asked him to cut off his penis. i have accepted she is not going anywhere, all i want is for him to decide which one he should have children with. his wife or his girlfriend, i think only one of us should be the mother.

his daughter isn't what i'm talking about, it is the next children. my feelings are that he will have more kids with her, not just me.

i'm lonely, 50+, divorced, gained a little weight, still attractive face, was a california girl back in the day, hung up most of my life, scared of sex, had lunch with my boss 60+, a glass of wine, smiles, touched his hand, he touched mine, two old people discovering sex all over again, without inhibitions, focused on my body, not scared to just be fucked, oral and oral and oral, touched and touched and touched, penetrated, and for the first time, surrendered my ass and found bliss.

discovered what it is like to just let him fuck, to feel it, all of it, feel it inside of you, to know that you are being fucked, and being ok with it. my little tootie got fucked last night. and i touch it gently to remind myself of the most awnsome experience of my life. i used to be angry because i wasn't a man and didn't have a dick, and here after all these years to discover that right there between my legs was all i ever needed to be content. for the first time i am ok with being a woman. women get fucked, men fuck. its ok, just cum together and be one.

i hate that mel from the stupid spice girls on that jenny craig ad. jenny craig does not work, the food is worse that dog food.

i feel so empty and depressed. i don't have much time to create anything because i have to focus on studying. i feel like a fish out of water.

and?

my cats are probably my closests friends. most people i meet are sketchy, though i still like to talk to other people.

i feel slightly at ease knowing that there's a sex shop in my town, so that when i'm old enough i can finally just walk in there and buy a dildo.

i'm a junior in college. my friend led a camp of high schoolers and some kids that are about to start college this summer. i helped out every now and then, but didn't really get to know them. when i met one of the boys in the group, i assumed he was one of the incoming college freshman, since he looked about that age. i thought he was good looking and whatnot. hell, i thought he was kinda hot! i eventually accepted his friend request on facebook, where i happily scrolled through his pictures. and eventually my innocent little crush became pretty lustful and i even fantasized about him while. masturbating. then the other day, while looking through his profile, i found out he's barely going to be a sophomore in high school. i immediately felt like a pervert, and still do. i wouldn't try anything with this boy, as it's illegal and just plain wrong. yet i can't keep my eyes off him, he's so handsome! somebody tell me i'm not the only one this has happened to.

im home alone and about to play with my ding a ling

today i have been thinking about suicide several times (i often do). i keep envisioning scenarios in my head where i kill myself (cut my wrist, jump off a tall building, drive into a tree in my car). i (luckily i guess) do not have the will or courage or whatever it is that it takes to make any of them reality. i suppose that i actually want to live, i just wish to have a better life. right now, however, life equals pain for me. and i want to have less pain, and thus i wish to die. one of the things that keeps me from going through with it, is the thought of my father and sisters reaction to my eventual death. my mother died 2½ years ago and i’m not over it yet. i wouldn’t want my father and sister to go through all of that again with a son/brother. if you’re still reading this please don’t worry about me. i’m probably not going to kill myself ever. i just need to vent.