i fear that i am like my mother. my father is a very dominating person, he dominates our lives completely. my mother has always ran around doing what he wants and when he wants. as i got older my mother took me into confidence and she told me about his expectations in the bedroom. knowing my father i don't doubt any of it. he is going to get what he wants, and it doesn't matter what you want.
i have tried to be with boys that are not like my dad. they are ok to talk with, but really it is just like talking to another girl. the guy that fucks me is just like my dad. and i do just like my mom, he calls and tells me to something, off i go to do it. i drop whatever i am doing and his call takes first place. i live at home, and he fucks me here at my house. my mom knows, and she just looks the other way. she knows that saying later or no is a waste of breath. on the weekend, when my dad and my 'boy friend' were watching tv, my bf asked me to fix him something to eat, i was on the phone and asked him to wait, my dad turned to my bf and asked him if he was 'going to let the little bitch' get away with that. i hung up and went and fixed him a sandwich.
i have talked to a counselor, when i am not with him i know that it is wrong, but i cannot say no and i can definitely not say no when he wants to have sex. my counselor says i 'learned' this from my mom, but i wonder if it not genetic. my mom and i just go very alpha males. like i said earlier, the other types of guys are good as friends, but i could never see myself having sex with them.