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I've never seen an episode of Game of Thrones...and I dont care.

My mother's nickname in high school used to be Miss Piggy. So I wonder if my father is Kermit the Frog porking Miss Piggy? So what does that make me if I'm the daughter of Kermit the Frog and Miss Piggy? Am I more frog or pig? Well I know I like green so I think I've more frog than pig.

Some Indian woman flipped me off on Instagram. And I think it's funny because I'm not the slightest bit threatened. She flipped me off because I insulted Lindsay Usich on Instagram and she is one of the b!tches followers. Yes I insulted your Queen. Because I hate your Cringe-Worthy Queen Lindsay Usich because she's a succubus demon wh0re from hell.

I want to be the first person to start the perverted Bagel challenge. The challenge goes as simple as this what you need to do is get a bagel of your choice of any flavor that you want get and get some cream cheese spread it on your bagel like you normally do then proceeded to do perverted things with that bagel and you can use your fingers and your mouth. What I want you to do is to film yourself doing really perverted sexual acts to that bagel then upload that video onto YouTube and put #pervertedbagelchallenge. You can even pretend that the bagel is somebody's butthole and you're tossing their salad.

I don't know why my cat decided to bite my boob? all I know is I have my clothes on completely and I'm not and naked and he launches out for my tit. And he tried to bite me the second time around but I covered my boob.

I like to take my turds and slingshot them at police officers. sometimes I leave a take cat turds and slingshot them at police officers. sometimes he'll even take dog turds slingshot them at police officers. Because I like to get even with police officers cuz I really hate Pigs. I also like to make really fat police officers chase after me, because they're too fat to keep up with me and that they are often out of breath and they are easily exhausted and I find that funny. I like to throw Donuts at them fat pig police officers while they are chasing me. The fat pigs they never catch me. HAHAHA"!

Just had one of those calls that started with, "Hi, is the head of the household there?"

Me: "hello hello?" Hang up and smiled.

Aren't I a little devil? LOL

I trying to teach my cat to sign. One day my cat will be able to sign in an opera house. I have very high hopes. But so far all I hear is meow meow meow.

I want to know what Marilyn Manson's obsession with AIDS is about? Why is Marilyn Manson so obsessed with AIDS? Why does he want to get AIDS and be generous and give the whole world AIDS? Why does he want to come back as AIDS? Does he have an obsession with South Park or something? Because it reminds me of that Jared episode where Jared from Subway says he wants to give the whole world AIDS. He just reminds me of that episode all together when he talks about how he wants to give their whole AIDS. My mother told me that if I ever had sex with Marilyn Manson that she's pretty sure I get AIDS from him because of all the pu$$y he gots. I just hope that Marilyn Manson doesn't have AIDS because I want to have sex with him. And I don't want to get AIDS and die. So I sure as hell hope he doesn't have AIDS. But I keep thinking as much as he jokes around about wanting to get AIDS I think someone's going to get the wrong idea and actually give him AIDS. Like somebody who has AIDS takes a syringe with their AIDS infested blood in it may potentially inject him with that syringe and give him AIDS. But I wonder if this would be a heroin addict? I'd be careful in San Francisco California because all of the syringes on the ground that you could potentially step on if you're barefooted and get AIDS. I don't want to get AIDS even though I understand Marilyn Manson's generous and wants to go the whole world AIDS. I think he needs to understand that there's other ways to be generous? So I just wonder if Marilyn Manson I'll come back as AIDS in his next lifetime?

i had a dream of somone that i had a crush on and that we were like doing stuff it was weird but being older i guess my feelings got the best of me.XD

people always tell me i'm coom. what they dont know is, i am actually very boring. jokes on them, i got em fooled.

I'm a news junkie.

fake news
fake news

It’s time for America’s favorite joke show, “Is it racist?”

-A flight full of people has both engines go out. The pilot calls for emergency measures, as the plane prepares for a possible crash landing. Amidst the chaos a passenger tries to begin having sex with the African-American woman next to him. She fights him off and sunmons a flight attendant. “What the hell are you doing, sir?” they ask, exacerbated.

“I heard when a plane goes down,” he replies, “Only the black box survives.”

Is it racist?

Just remembered a text conversation I had years ago and it made me giggle for some reason.

Me: "Haha, I like you"
Some guy: "Oh I think you're cool, but I don't date girls younger than me."
Me: "Dude I said that I like you, not that I want to date you."

Oh, to be young and blunt again...

im not even going to be in australia much longer... i might not even see you again! but i dunno, over time i have just developed a crush on you. i used to just think you were really shy but then i realised you were really down to earth and not trapped in this shitty rat race everyone else is stuck in. you seemed like you actually wanted to explore and experience life from your own perspective not that which is forced upon us by society. i dont really know when things started changing but i just had this feeling like i was safe around you and you had my back. and i had/have yours too. i feel really protective of you haha, i feel like you prob have that affect on everyone around you. especially considering one persons behaviour. but i dunno man, i dont even care, its kind of weird because we aren’t close but i like you, i could never tell you that because it would be so ridiculous but i think you might be the funniest person i’ve ever met. and also the cutest. definitely the cutest.

jOke tImE!

What’s the difference between grapes and rape?

One tastes delicious and other is totally fine with Republicans!


I just spotted ManBearPig again and No One Believes me and no one takes me cereal I'm so cereal. I told you all about ManBearPig and I warned you and you didn't listen to me. Well Manbearpig is here.

Mother likes to fart Wal-mart and Menards and make random people gag on farts. And she likes to brag about it.

I love being a female troll on the internet and I love to troll random people for $hits and giggles.

I've been really depressed lately, but that's not the point. Today I genuinely smiled because while doing laundry today, as I was walking back to my apartment, this beautiful stray cat I've seen around for months finally came up to me and started rubbing against my leg and pushing its head up against my hand as cats do. As cheesy as it sounds it felt like an anime scene, for those of you familiar. I was so touched by this little moment I started cryin of joy, because I had finally smiled out of something pure, by my own volition, and not just to be polite or whatever. Idk i just really felt like writing it down, it's too insignificant to say to anyone I know, but it means a lot to me.